Weird, beautiful stage of life this is – the older singlehood. It’s an interesting truth of singleness as a not-20-years-young that no one talks about – something that has struck me before but perhaps I have ignored, or squished because well I went “it is what it is!” ha.

But today, I just had to wonder out loud – once people are married / kids etc. is there some switch that goes off in one’s brains that indicates that from that moment on, even if based within the same geographical location, one should no longer take the effort to be intentional to connect with the singles. Or is this is an expected way of life, that once you move into another stage of life, you can no longer be a participant of another stage-r, unless or until they catch up with one’s stage?

I don’t know the answer yet, but I do know that as an older single woman, I connect emotionally better with women closer to my age, but if they are in the not-single stage, we don’t seem to be connected, even when connected? And so they don’t make the intentionality to connect. As for the younger ones who I can share the single-hood things, well, I can’t always connect with because their emotional needs are in a different space than I, and so the age gap makes the connection seem fake and forced, at times. And so I don’t make the intentionality to connect?
And to this, I add, in some twisted way, do the married / family folk also feel this disconnect from a non-married person that leads to an un-intentionality to connect, perhaps even vice versa?

Or, are people genuinely keen to connect, but they genuinely cannot find it in their schedule to make time for themselves, leave along others? Or, am I just around some people who don’t make an effort for me, and I just don’t know it? Or, am I just being blind to other’s struggles and seeing things only from my own perspective, because life is not often that shallow. Ha, I think I know now.